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Father's Day is the occasion we use to show our gratitude for all that dad does, and what better way to express it than through a basketful of laugh-out-loud dad jokes? According to "Fatherly", these lame one-liners are indeed signs of love, cheesy as they may be. As well as being amusing little tokens that bring joy within the family circle, Dad Jokes also demonstrate how much dads care enough about making their loved ones smile during this special day!
Note: These jokes are supposed to be fun and make you laugh. However, if you feel that some are intrusive or offends you, or others, in any way, don't hesitate to contact us. We will remove the jokes that doesn't bring joy to people's lives.
Check out our amazing selection of 232 Father's Day dad jokes that are sure to make your whole family laugh. From puns to one-liners, these goofy quips will brighten up any dinner table conversation or be the perfect thing for you to tell Dad this Father’s Day! With so many funny options, there is something here guaranteed to put a smile on everyone’s face.
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Everyone can relish the puns and humor of dad jokes! Kids will be in stitches over these playful puns, while adults will marvel at their creativity. What better way to make this Father's Day special than by enjoying a jolly chuckle with some classic dad jokes? Studies from Cambridge University have suggested that laughter has wonderful effects on our mental health, so why not take time out of your hectic schedule to embrace the power of levity? Celebrate Dad with a smile today!
Check out these 232 awesome Father's Day Dad Jokes for guaranteed laughs all around.
- How does Kylo Ren spend Father's Day? Solo.
- Who is this? Pupil: This is my father speaking!
- What do you call a cranky grandfather? A grumpa.
- My father has schizophrenia, but he’s good people.
- What is the most awkward day in Harlem? Father's Day.
- What did father bee say to his rebelling son? Beehive!
- Why did my grandfather cross the road? to occupy France.
- Why is it called a 'dad-bod' and not a 'father-figure'?
- What's the most confusing day in the hood? Father's Day.
- what kind of pants does the godfather wear? al pa-chinos.
- Jim Henson's first job was operating The Godfather logo.
- If it's a boy, I'm naming him after my father, Anonymous.
- How many chimney does Father Christmas go down? Stacks!
- How do you call a cross-dressing father of two? Transparent.
- What is the most confusing holiday in Harlem? Father's Day.
- How does Kendall Jenner celebrate Father's Day? She doesn't.
- A quote from the Father of Invention. Hi Invention, I'm Dad.
- Happy Father's Day or, mass confusion, if you live in Harlem.
- Stevie Wonder is the worst Father Hasnt seen his kids in years.
- How do you find an ant's forefathers? Check it's ants-history.
- What do you call a father who was kidnapped in Iraq? A Baghdad.
- Why did the cookie cry? Because his father was a wafer so long!
- Why did Kim Jong Un's father go to hospital? He was Kim Jong Il.
- What does the daddy gun have when he becomes a father? A bb gun.
- What did ataturk's Father Say to him when he did well? Adda-Turk.
- I want to be a father someday But my son says I should start now.
- What do you call a priest that becomes a lawyer? A father in law.
- The father of Mike Davidson, what's his full name? David Mikesdaad.
- My grandfather lost his tongue during WW2 He never talks about it.
- Why does Father Christmas go down chimneys? Because they soot him!
- What is the most confusing holiday in Harlem? Father's day"-unknown.
- What's the most deserted place on fathers day? The visitation ward.
- Why did Ted Cruz's father assassinate JFK? To get to the other side!
- I was raised by my father.. He's schizophrenic but he's good people.
- Darth Vader, you are the father! --Star Wars cast on the set of Maury.
- Why are Fathers like parking spaces? The good ones are already taken!
- Son: What is an autobiography? Father: Er the story of an automobile.
- What is the best movie like to shout as you orgasm? I am your father.
- My father owned a body removal business He lifted a lot of dead weight.
- My grandfather has the heart of a lion And a lifetime ban from the zoo.
- What do you call a Muslim father who works at a supermarket? a Baghdad.
- Gifts for the family Nephew- iPod Son- iPhone Father- iPad Mother-iRon.
- What do you get if you cross a cat with Father Christmas ? Santa Claws!
- My father got crushed by a falling piano. His funeral was very low key.
- What did the father buffalo say to his son when he left the farm? Bison.
- Why does Father Time wear bandages? Because day breaks and night falls.
- Why is King Arthur seen as the Father of England? Because he came-alot
- What did the mother bullet say to the father bullet? We're having a BB.
- What did they call the sad little fish poop with no father? A bass turd.
- A father asked his son how baking school was going "I knead some dough."
- What did the Spanish boy leaving for the city say to his father? Ciudad!
- How does father Christmas get away with suing everyone? The Santa Clause.
- My grandfather has the heart of a lion and a lifetime ban from local zoo.
- What did the father buffalo say when his son went off to college? Bison."
- What does Father Christmas call that reindeer with no eyes? No-eyed-deer!
- My Grandfather has the heart of a lion! And a ban from the cincinnati zoo.
- Why was the mother cow mad at father cow? Because she had beef with him.
- I was raised by my father.. He was schizophrenic, but he was good people.
- It's like my father always used to say, "[years of silent disappointment]"
- What did the father buffalo say when his son went off to college? "Bison."
- My LOTR joke If Gimli's father was evil, would he be called Gloin the Dark?
- What did the old maid get the vasaline for? 84 cents. Joke by my grandfather.
- You raised me and taught me everything I know. Happy Father's Day, internet.
- What is colder than the dwarf planet Pluto? Legal judgements against fathers.
- My Grandfathers dying words to me were, "Are you still holding the ladder?".
- My Grandfather had the heart of a Lion and a lifetime BAN from the city Zoo.
- Someone stole the coffin at my grandfather's funeral. I couldn't bereave it!
- What do you call your mother's father when he's good to you? A Grand-father.
- What do you get if you cross Father Christmas with a detective ? Santa Clues !
- My estranged father bought me a telescope for Christmas We're a lot closer now.
- Apple needs to build a product for older gentlemen who have become fathers. iPop.
- What is an over protective German father's favorite game? Sudoku a game of neins!
- What does the digital clock say to the grandfather clock? Look Grandpa, no hands!
- What do you call a fish that makes you an offer you cant refuse? The Codfather. ()
- What did the digital clock say to the grandfather clock? "Look grandpa, no hands!"
- How do you know if a joke is a dad joke? A dad joke has to reach father for a pun.
- Huh, maybe THIS pizza delivery guy will be the father figure I've been looking for.
- My father found the cure for gonorrhea. It was under the TV guide where he left it.
- currently texting 'Happy Father's Day' to all the men in my phone to freak them out.
- The biggest thing I've learned at art school is the art of disappointing my father.
- Why was the father centipede annoyed? Because all of his children needed new shoes.
- Girl posted on Facebook: All men are dogs! I commented: Which breed is your father?
- Which book has helped you the most in your life? Student: "My father's check book!"
- Why did the melon try so hard to get her father's approval? Because she cant-aloupe.
- What were Steve Jobs children told to do when their father passed away? Steve's Job.
- My father was a seal, my mother was a yak. What does that make me? Wheat intolerant.
- What do you call a big fish who makes you an offer you can't refuse ? The Codfather!
- My grandfather got his tongue cut out in a POW camp He doesn't like to talk about it.
- My Grandfather had the heart of a lion and a lifetime ban from the New York City Zoo.
- Why did the baby monster put his father in the freezer? Because he wanted frozen pop.
- My kids had a shirt made for me that says 'father of the year 2014 quarter finalist'.
- I have come up with the most awkward event of all time: the Father-Son wedding dance.
- Why does Father Christmas like to work in the garden ? Because he likes to hoe hoe hoe.
- My grandfather drowned in varnish recently. A horrible way to go, but a lovely finish.
- Two Scots father and son go to America. - Daddy when we'll arrive? - Shut up and swim.
- What do you call a see through father who was born with female genitalia? Transparent.
- Did you hear about the little boy who was named after his father ? They called him Dad!
- Girl I like keeps putting me in the "dad zone" Good thing this weekend is Father's Day.
- I could've been a boxer, like my father. He could've been one too Source: Simon Munnery.
- Had Maury Povich been in Star Wars, we would have known who the father was a lot sooner.
- What did the young digital clock say to its Grandfather clock? "Look Grandpa, no hands!"
- What did the brazillian father ask for for christmas from his wife? A little head, baby"
- What Do You Call A Syrian Mother, Father, And Child That Live Together? A nuclear family.
- By the time a man realises that his father was right, he has a son who thinks he's wrong.
- Most computer problems stem from the lack of a fatherboard. No? Ok, I'll show myself out.
- My Father always said "You should fight fire with fire" He didn't last long as a fireman.
- My father used to say "Take everything with a pinch of salt" Nice man. Made terrible tea.
- My 83 year old grandfather is still trying to be a successful rapper, his name? Two canes.
- Did you hear about the Chinese godfather? He made them an offer they couldn't understand.
- What wasn't stolen when CVS was looted during the Baltimore riots? The Father's Day cards.
- Did you hear about the fat absent father? He was never around, but at least he was portly.
- Just imagine if Usain Bolt was your father and you were trying to run away from a beating.
- What do you call the father of a frog that is in the early stages of its life? *A Dadpole*
- My dad annoyed my mom calling her "Mother of 7" until the day she called him "Father of 4".
- How do you know if a Catholic girl puts out? Ask her about her relationship with her father.
- What does Father Christmas suffer from if he gets stuck in a chimney ? Santa Claustrophobia!
- I got my born-again mother an FML shirt for Christmas. Telling her it means Father, My Lord.
- What's Father Christmas called when he takes a rest while delivering presents ? Santa pause!
- One time Father Christmas lost his underpants. That's how he got the name Saint Knickerless!
- My father never told me why he removed the last page of my comics. I drew my own conclusions.
- What do you get when you cross a lawyer with the Godfather? A: An offer you can't understand.
- Son: Where are the Himalayas? Father: If you'd put things away you'd know where to find them.
- Teacher: Did your father help your with your homework? Student: No, he did it all by himself.
- What do you get a first dad for father's day? Condoms. Courtesy of my witty ole' uncle mike.
- Hey dad, how does it feel to have such a handsome son? I don't know son, ask your grandfather.
- Luke, I am your father. Man you should see your face right now. It's all like waaaaaat no way.
- Did you hear the one about the Chinese Godfather? He made him an offer he couldn't understand.
- may your fathers prosper. may your friends be uglier than you. may your exes get food poisoning.
- I bet our Founding Fathers never envisioned a Justin Bieber video getting heavy airplay on BET.
- What did the Arab's father say when the teacher told him his son bombed the test? Thats great!"
- The movie spoiler you won't be able to avoid this Xmas! It turns out Alvin is Theodore's FATHER!
- A kid asked his father why he was giving the weird name Potedad. The dad said it was an anagram.
- What did the Arab's father say when the teacher told him his son bombed the test? "Thats great!"
- Do you know why George Washington 's father forgive him? Because Washington still holding the axe.
- My boss just asked if I'm illiterate, which is offensive because I know exactly who my father is.
- I found out today why my father never came home from the store.. The store had a no-return policy.
- Just became a father last week! My son is a tea fanatic, can you guess his favorite kind? Tit-tea.
- Why are Father Christmas' reindeer like a cricket match? Because they're both stopped by the rein.
- What would the US form of government be if the founding fathers had been atheist? Fedoral republic.
- When the Baltimore rioters looted the CVS, they stole everything except for the Father's Day cards.
- How does the Consigliere get into the Godfather's house late at night? with his own set of donkeys!
- My step-dad's pretty cool. Not as cool as my fence-dad, though. Roof-dad is okay. What is a father?
- Bless me, Father, for I have used Comic Sans. It's been eight weeks since my last use of Helvetica.
- Vader: I AM your father. Luke: Why are you telling me this now? Vader: Luke: Vader: I need a kidney.
- My grandfather was an alcoholic but an amazing magician Whenever he wanted he could turn into a bar.
- This joke is best told with a german accent Why did my grandfather cross the road? -to occupy France.
- Father: I hear you skipped school to play football Son: No I didn't and I have the fish to prove it!
- What happened when the vase revealed it was the father? I'm not sure, but it was quite the pot twist.
- I was devastated to find my first love in bed with my own father. "We've been through this," said Mom.
- Why did the Founding Fathers hire accountants from Prague? They needed a system of Czechs and balances.
- I want to die peacefully, like my grandfather Not screaming, like the people in the bus he was driving.
- Luke use the father - Nuke I am your force Yay twist on words, so funneh. My friends says i'm hilarous.
- What do you call a farting Russian? Vladimir Putin ~ You can thank my 65 year old grandfather for this.
- A son tells his father that the first driving lesson was great. Until the police stopped the stolen car!
- So a father comes into his sons room.. And asks him: How are you? His son then answers: I'm fine thanks.
- Why do you only buy water from that dancer? Because," the father said with a grin, "I enjoy *tap* water!"
- A man walks into a bar And tells a terrible joke about shooting your father. He will never do that again.
- Do you think Lincoln was good at pleasuring the ladies? If he was, did they call him the pounding father?
- She pays in all ones because her father taught to always ask for small bills. Her father was a bank robber.
- My grandfather was treated very badly by the Germans in WW2. Passed over for promotion time and time again.
- A truamatizing joke for a single mother to tell their child(ren) "You look like your father, whoever he is."
- The day you introduce your mom to Chuck Norris, is the day you mom introduces you to your biological father.
- What happened after 14-Year-Old Richie inherited his father's footwear empire? He came into a lot of socks.
- Facebook has a link to "Report a Problem" so I wrote "I'm not very close with my father." Now we wait I guess.
- Why did the boy call 911 when his father ran a red light? He didn't want to go home early and do his homework!
- As a father of girls, I think the best interview method for potential suitors will be: "Let me see your phone"
- What did my grandfather say before he kicked the bucket? "I wonder how far I can kick this bucket" Ba dum tsssh.
- My father thinks himself an expert at cutting through busy sidewalks. I consider his ability rather pedestrian.
- What did the paraplegic father say when his teenage daughter came out of the closet? I will not stand for this.
- Book that helped Teacher: "Which book has helped you the most in your life?" Student: "My father's check book!"
- A woman in my hometown says that 50 Cent is 100% her son's father. Although, it's closer to 50 percent per Cent.
- You know what my grandfather said right before he kicked the bucket? "Hey, watch how far I can kick this bucket!"
- A good way to break up with a girl gently is to curtsy when youre meeting her father instead of shaking his hand.
- What did Truman Burbank's father say to him? Don't you worry don't you worry child, Seahaven's got a plan for you.
- As a father, I would refuse to give my daughter away at her wedding on the grounds that I would have to be there.
- Son: Daddy, what's it like to have the most awesome son in the world ? Father: I don't know, ask your grandfather.
- When improv teams ask for suggestions, I like to yell "Learn a trade before your father cuts you off financially!"
- A month before my grandfather died we decided to cover his back in lard. After that he went downhill very quickly.
- The last thing my father said to me before he kicked the bucket Hey, son. Check out how far I can kick this bucket.
- I refused to believe my road worker father was stealing from his job, but when I got home, all the signs were there.
- My mother-in-law's text alert is an entire song. Starting to think my father-in-law's rage isn't really from Vietnam.
- Father: Well Son how are your exam results ? Son: They're under water Father: What do you mean ? Son: Below "C" level!
- My dad and I were never that close. The company he worked for once had a "father-son" picnic and he invited his father.
- My Father said: do unto others as you would have them do unto you.' So I sent him to a girls boarding school in France.
- Dr: your father is real sick Woman: [sobbing] how long? [her dad wheelies past on a bmx] Dr: almost six yards that time.
- You know what the last thing my grandfather said before he kicked the bucket "How far you think I can kick this bucket"
- Why was the little drop of ink so sad? Because his father was in the pen, and he didn't know how long the sentence was!
- What do you get when David Lynch directs a remake of The Godfather? Someone who makes you an offer you can't understand.
- QUIT TELLING ME WHAT TO DO! YOU'RE NOT MY FOUNDING FATHER! - strict constitutional constructionist teen to the President.
- What song do Father Christmas' gnomes sing to him when he comes home cold on Christmas night? Freeze a jolly good fellow!
- Father: What did the teacher think of your idea? Son: She took it like a lamb Teacher: Really? what did she say? Son: Baa!
- The prince didn't mind living in his father's luxurious house but some days it was hard living in the chateau of his father.
- Girls are too sensitive. She said she was having twins and I said, "At least you'll finally have 2 kids by the same father."
- I see your point. You're right. My timing could have been much better. I'm sorry I proposed to you at your father's funeral.
- A son whale asks his father "Dad, where did I come from?" "You come from your mother, son." "Thanks, dad." "You're whalecum."
- A rabbit has a father who has a big hair care product empire and wonders if one day his child will become the Hair heir hare.
- I wonder during the election for Pope, did the other cardinals point to the losers and say excitedly "you are NOT the father"
- Father in law just made an accidental calculus joke By the time I got to calculus in math, I realized I had reached my limit.
- In case you wondered, Fathers Day is to thank Dad for nailing your mother. Mothers Day is to thank Mom for not swallowing you.
- A boy asks his father, "Where's the big storm going?" The father replies, "Miami." The son says, "Is your Ami going to be ok?"
- My father works as a statistician at Ford. He must be pretty well-respected there, people are always asking for his auto graph.
- Baltimore CVS Looters They really cleaned the place out. The only things they left behind are sunscreen and Father's Day cards.
- My father once told me, "Son, if you want people to listen to what you have to say, claim it's something your father told you."
- Being a father is the single greatest feeling on earth. Not including those wonderful years I spent without a child, of course.
- Who's your daddy? I accidentally said "How's your daddy " and we put our clothes back on and discussed her father's cholesterol.
- About a month before he died, my grandmother covered my grandfather's back with lard. After that, he went downhill very quickly.
- TEACHER: "Can anybody give an example of COINCIDENCE?" JOHNNY: "Sir my Mother and Father got married on the same day same time."
- I just had the thought "pfft. Your father can't die before you are born," and I believed it for a full minute. Because I'm smert.
- Father's Day is a great time to give your father a tie so he can look extra nice at the job he settled for because you were born.
- Mum: Jackie go outside and play with your whistle. Your father can't read his paper. Jackie: Wow I'm only eight and I can read it.
- Kylo Ren: I am your father. Rey: We're roughly the same age. You're just copying everything Vader said. Kylo Ren: NOOOOOOOOOOO!!!
- So, I asked my grandfather why he doesn't have a life insurance His answer? "Because I want you to be truly sad when I'm gone" :(
- If the Founding Fathers were alive today, what would they be doing? clawing at the tops of their coffins and screaming, probably.
- I didn't want to believe my father was stealing from the transportation department. But when I got home, all the signs were there.
- Disney couldn't handle my awesome script. Kylo Ren was Rey's father. Finn was her brother. Chewbacca was her cousin twice removed.
- Why do men sound like they're having an orgasm when they're lifting weights? And why is my father lifting weights in the bathroom
- My mom says I look just like my father. It's weird that she thinks that, because everyone else says I look like Steve the mailman.
- In honor of Father's day, here is a typical dad joke. Did you hear about the guy who invented Lifesavers? They say he made a mint.
- If I had 5 dollars in one pocket and 5 dollars in the other what do I have? Someone else's pants on. My grandfathers favorite joke.
- A little boy asked his father, "Daddy, how much does it cost to get married?" Father replied, "I don't know son, I'm still paying."
- My Father was never proud of me One day he asked me, "how old are you." I said, "I'm five" he said,"when I was your age, I was six"
- There's nothing I've learned from being a father that I couldn't just as easily have figured out from setting all my money on fire.
- My father put a lot of pressure on me as a child. He used to say stuff like "You're five years old? When I was your age I was six!"
- How did the founding fathers of Canada name there country? They drew letters from a hat. "A 'C' eh! An 'N' eh! A 'D' eh!" they cried.
- What did Oprah say when she visited Harlem? YOU get a father, and YOU get a father, and YOU get a father! Everybody gets a father!!!
- My father was never proud of me. One day he asked me, "How old are you?" I said, "I'm five." He said, "When I was your age I was six."
- School day Son: I can't go to school today. Father: Why not? Son: I don't feel well Father: Where don't you feel well? Son: In school!
- You did not have a valentine on valentines day? Some people don't have a mother on mother's day or a father on father's day so shut up.
- Father's Day Fun: 1) Walk up to a complete stranger at lunch with his family. 2) Hug him. 3) Tell him 'Happy Father's Day dad'! 4) Run.
- My grandfather said he'd never be caught dead wearing cargo pants, so I slipped the funeral director an extra 50 bucks. And now we wait.
- Why did the farmer screw their sheep on a cliff? They push back harder. (Told to me by my NZ step father about Australians, of course.)
- How were the exam questions? Son: Easy Father: Then why look so unhappy Son: The questions didn't give me any trouble just the answers!