Jokes Dad Jokes Holiday Holiday Jokes

74 Best Holiday Dad Jokes that Will Bring Cheer to Your Season

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74 Best Holiday Dad Jokes that Will Bring Cheer to Your Season

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Are you ready for a laugh-out-loud experience? Tired of searching for the perfect dad joke? Look no further! This collection of 80 humor-filled dad jokes is here to bring cheer and laughter this holiday season. Whether you're a proud father looking to get your kids laughing or just seeking some good old fun, we've got it all, from puns to one-liners guaranteed to put a smile on everyone's face. So snuggle up with a mugful of eggnog, sit back, and enjoy the funniest dad jokes around!

Dad jokes are infamous for their terrible humor, yet they hold a place of endearment in our hearts. They bring us back to the comical side of our fathers and allow us to reminisce on childhood memories with family members. What makes dad jokes so special is how much warmth and nostalgia come along with them!

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But don't let the off-putting reputation of dad jokes discourage you; they provide much more than just a fleeting chuckle. Recent research has revealed that humor, and particularly dad jokes, can significantly boost our mental health by reducing stress levels and uplifting our mood. With hectic holiday schedules around the corner, these puns are an ideal remedy to help us power through!

Without further delay, it's time to explore our vast array of 74 hilarious holiday dad jokes!

  1. Where do weaboos holiday? Kawaii.
  2. Where do idiots go on holiday? Twitzerland.
  3. What's a pilots least favorite holiday? May Day!
  4. My cat just showed it's holiday spirit by pooping tinsel.
  5. What's the most confusing holiday in Harlem? Father's Day.
  6. Lent is a holiday invented by the banks to sell more loans.
  7. Why can't rappers take holidays? They always forget Tupac.
  8. What is the Taliban's Favorite Holiday Footwear? Missile Toe!
  9. I workout religiously About once or twice around the holidays.
  10. What does a llama do when it goes on holidays? Alpaca ya bags.
  11. Alsation: What is your favorite holiday? Chihuahua: Howloween!
  12. Which November holiday is a weed smoker's favorite? Danksgiving.
  13. What do xenophobes do on Star Trek when the holidays come? Egg Nog.
  14. What is the most confusing holiday in Harlem? Father's day"-unknown.
  15. Last summer holiday I went to Iraq for vacation. I was so scared Iran.
  16. A maternity ward was overflowing one national holiday It was Labor day.
  17. I like my children how I like my Christmas decorations Only on the holidays.
  18. What do heavily-armored army vehicles celebrate for the holidays? tanksgiving.
  19. My friend recently arrived in Turkey for his annual holiday. He is doing bird.
  20. Holiday Tip: if you boil a turd on low heat the whole house smells like farts.
  21. I've just been on a once-in-a-lifetime holiday I'll tell you what, never again.
  22. For the holidays I've decided to stop making puns. I'm sure yule appreciate it.
  23. Why did the man with acute bronchitis go on holiday? Because he had a wee cough.
  24. Jim Apple finds introducing himself very problematic when holidaying in France.
  25. So did you have a nice,relaxing holiday asked the all people without three kids.
  26. What do you get if you cross a sheep with a holiday resort ? The Baaahaaamaaas!
  27. Knock Knock Who's there! Argo! Argo who ? Argo down to the beach for my holidays.
  28. What's the best language to describe the hectic holiday shopping season? Russian.
  29. Why is it a bad idea to wear tiny shorts on a Ukranian holiday? Chernobyl fallout.
  30. I was going to book a holiday to Sweden But then I realised I couldn't af-fjord it.
  31. Why was Easter the aardvark's favorite holiday? Because he liked aard-boiled eggs!
  32. The main thing I want this holiday season is for someone to wake me when it's over.
  33. How did Jim start losing weight after the holidays? He just quit eating cold turkey.
  34. Why isn't the holiday on December 25th pronounced "Chlistmas"? Because there's no L.
  35. I can still blame my unhealthy eating on "the holidays", right? President's Day is coming up.
  36. What famous hotel chain do muslims prefer when travelling on religious holidays? Ramadamadan.
  37. Just used the holiday card with your kid's face on it to scoop up a dog turd in the living room.
  38. The holiday season is coming up. Every year I make my parents something. I make them disappointed.
  39. My dad only says I love you on special occasions like birthdays, holidays, and competency hearings.
  40. I'm on holiday visiting the math dept. at Univ. of Manchester, England. I guess I'm an Alan Turist.
  41. When you call home on a holiday and get passed around, it's worse than being included on a group text.
  42. How do you know when an accountant's on holidays? He doesn't wear a tie to work and comes in after 8.30.
  43. Teacher: "Why do we have a Thanksgiving holiday?" Student: "So we know when to start Christmas shopping!"
  44. Thanks for the holiday photo! I can't believe your little girls are already unhappy, overweight teenagers!
  45. Never kick a porcupine wearing flip flops. Cause they're obviously on vacation and why ruin their holiday?
  46. My dad is Jamaican and my mum is Iranian, which meant that we spent most of our family holidays in Customs.
  47. New Year's is just a holiday created by calendar companies who don't want you reusing last year's calendar.
  48. What's the most confusing holiday in the hood? Kwanzaa. I don't think anyone has a clue what that holiday is.
  49. If your left leg was thanksgiving, and your right leg is Christmas, can I come visit you between the holidays?
  50. There's a new holiday in Russia called "National Sobriety Day" People are at a loss as to how to celebrate it.
  51. What would Arnold Schwarzenegger say if you asked him his favorite holiday? You have to love easter, baby."
  52. Give them a Cheesecake Factory gift card this holiday season so they know you "grocery store checkout line" love them.
  53. People are getting way too eager for holidays there's 365 days till Christmas and people already have decorations up!
  54. Looking at cows in a field, how can you tell which one's on holiday? It's the one with the wee calf. (Think Scottish)
  55. Bad news, the police just seized our German holiday bread. They said it was stollen. Folks, they said it was stollen.
  56. Holiday tip: remember, you only have a few days left to drop out of people's lives to avoid buying gifts. You're welcome.
  57. july 4th is my favorite holiday bc i can practice my Friends theme claps every time a firework explodes without anyone noticing.
  58. Just think about this: Jeff Goldblum is someone's uncle. Jeff Goldblum goes to someone's house for holidays and is Jeff Goldblum.
  59. The hotel we stayed in for our holiday offered bed and board but it was impossible to say which was the bed and which was the board.
  60. Grandma Got Ran Over by a Reindeer is my favorite song about how to incorrectly deal with the loss of a loved one during the holiday.
  61. Afraid to fly? It's perfectly safe except that air traffic controllers are all gov't employees forced to work the holidays. Merry Xmas.
  62. Did you hear about the monster who went to a holiday camp? He won the ugly mug and knobbly knees competition and he wasn't even entered.
  63. Valentine's Day is nothing but a commercialized holiday created by pharmaceutical companies to get lonely singles to buy antidepressants.
  64. Has the passing of the holidays left you feeling alone in the world, unloved and depressed? Don't worry, Valentine's Day is coming right up!
  65. I don't mind getting the stink-eye when I say, "Happy Whatever Holiday You're Weirdly Touchy About," because THAT is the spirit of Whatever.
  66. The holidays are coming. If you do NOT want snakes please send me a notarized letter asking for NO SNAKES. Otherwise you are getting snakes.
  67. It's claimed Macaulay Culkin's health problems are linked to a difficult childhood. No sh1t. His parents forgot to take him on holiday 4 times.
  68. Putin goes on holiday! Vladimir Putin arrives at an airport, gets in line at customs desk. Customs officer: Occupation? Putin: No, just visiting.
  69. I knew my camping holiday was doomed when I saw the people at the next pitch struggling with a torn ground sheet and bent pegs. It was a portent.
  70. What is the Taliban's Favorite Holiday Footwear? What is the Taliban's favorite holiday footwear? Missile Toe! Source: My brother on the way home from subway.
  71. Being a teacher is great, I only work a half day 12 hours/day. Thank you, don't forget to tip your TA, I'll be here all week (M-F except Federal Holiday) folks!
  72. Anyone else like the holidays of other cultures? Like, I love the one where you take a bunch of presents and hide them in the attic. Or as you may know it, Anne Frank's birthday.
  73. For the past couple of years, I have been saying that the only holidays worth celebrating are the equinoxes and the solstices. I find all of the others to be astronomically unimportant.
  74. I can't decide whether to go to Australia or Thailand this year for a holiday. So I decided to weigh up the pros and cons of both. Australia has a load of Cons, but Thailand has lots of Pros.
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